


practice makes perfect (and perfection’s me and you)

by sekai_tbh



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Anal Sex, Barebacking, Best Friends, Blow Jobs, Bottom Oh Sehun, Denial of Feelings, Experimentation, Explicit Sexual Content, Feelings, Feelings Realization, First Kiss, First Time, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Grinding, Growing Up Together, Hand Jobs, Intercrural Sex, Jealousy, Kissing, M/M, Making Out, Masturbation, Misunderstandings, Pining, Practice Kissing, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Teen Angst, Time Skips, Top Kim Jongin | Kai, Underage - Freeform, Underage Drinking, Underage Kissing, Underage Sex, kind of, slight kaistal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-07-18 03:31:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16109885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sekai_tbh/pseuds/sekai_tbh
Summary: “You know,wecould always...” Jongin trails off, using a hand to wave in the space between the two of them. He hadn't meant to blurt it out so casually like that, but there wasn’t anything he could do about it now, the words already out in the open. Besides, it made perfect sense. They could learn how to kiss together. Kill two birds with one stone, or whatever.But then Sehun isn’t smiling anymore, and Jongin knew he had to say something else, and fast.(I'm kidding. I'm fucking with you.)Both were good responses to diffuse the situation; to play this off as some stupid joke. What comes out of his mouth instead is, “It's not going to be forever, Sehun. Only until we get good. A way for us to practice so we're not completely lost when it comes down to the real thing. It's really no big deal.” He shrugs.It's silent for a long time, and Jongin is mentally kicking himself, half expecting for Sehun to call him a freak and storm out. But then suddenly, Sehun is nodding, a slow bob of his head, voice soft as he mumbles, “Okay.”-Or the one where Jongin and Sehun are best friends who practice how to kiss with each other and everything's good. Until it's not.





	practice makes perfect (and perfection’s me and you)

**Author's Note:**

> hello~~ 
> 
> i’ve been working on this fic for almost a month, and now it’s done!!! ^_^ it’s the longest single chaptered fic i’ve ever written, and it really is my pride and joy UWU so i really hope y’all enjoy!!! 
> 
> please let me know what you think!! 
> 
> thank you <3

It all started on a Tuesday afternoon in early October.

They're in Jongin's room, having come here straight after school ended for a joint study session. Sehun is lying on the floor on his stomach, various books and papers scattered around his form as he scribbles away on his mathematics sheet. Jongin is seated next to him, his back resting against the foot of his bed and a binder balanced on his lap, opened up to his homework. The television across the room is on, playing some random drama program and providing background noise as the two work diligently.

It's Jongin who speaks first, eyes taking a momentary break from the complicated formulas on his sheet to look up at the screen. “Do you ever worry about that?”

“About what?” Sehun mumbles, nibbling on the end of his pen as he flips through his textbook.

“That.” Jongin points lazily to the television screen, and Sehun finally looks up, only to see a male and female kissing quite heatedly. “Y'know, kissing a girl,” Jongin adds in explanation when Sehun doesn't say anything right away.

Sehun removes his eyes from the glare of the screen to squint at him. “Dude.”

Jongin shrugs, a hint of a flush on his cheeks. “What? It's a... normal concern.”

Sehun shakes his head and looks back down at his homework. “Maybe for you. The only thing I'm concerned about now is getting this done before class tomorrow.”

“Hear me out, yeah?” Jongin pleads, and Sehun sighs dramatically before giving the other his full attention. “Let's say you get together with a girl you like, and the perfect moment presents itself for a kiss. But you don't have any experience, so when you try to kiss her, it's terrible?”

Sehun blinks. “Seriously?” He deadpans, and Jongin scratches his cheek sheepishly, averting his eyes. “Where's this all coming from, Jongin?”

“I don't know.” He motions lamely to the screen. “The show, I guess.”

Sehun reaches out to flick his ankle. “Liar.”

Jongin kicks his foot back in reflex. He knows it’s no use lying. They’ve known each other since they were just small children, and because of that, they can read each other like an open book. “Fine. So, maybe it's been on my mind for a while now. Sue me.”

He shuts his binder and places it aside, uncrossing his legs to stretch them out. “It's just... I'm almost fifteen, and I haven't kissed anyone yet! I know absolute shit about how to kiss properly. And what if the first girl I kiss goes out and tells everyone about how bad I am at it? I’ll be a laughing stock.” He sighs, picking on a loose string on his pants.

Sehun tilts his head, tapping his index finger against his chin. “Sooo, let me get this straight. You've never kissed anyone before, and you're worried your future girl is gonna rag on you because you're inexperienced?” Jongin nods. There's a moment's pause before Sehun curls over in laughter, unknowingly crinkling up a few of his papers in the process.

“Bro, really?” He asks in between giggles, his eyes turning up in crescents.

Jongin frowns. He crosses his arms over his chest and whines, “Don’t make fun of me.”

Sehun moves to sit up, wiping imaginary tears from the corners of his eyes. His voice is still laced with traces of laughter as he shuffles over to Jongin's side, knee touching Jongin's gently. “Sorry, sorry. But did you forget that I’m turning fifteen, too, and I haven't been kissed either? Honestly, this is the first time I've even thought about this!”

Jongin groans and lets his head thump against his bed. “I should've just kept my mouth shut. I thought my _best_ _friend_ would actually try to take me seriously.” He tosses Sehun a glare.

The younger boy rolls his eyes. “Alright, alright. If you're so concerned about it, then why don't you practice? Look up a tutorial or some shit on the web.” He suggests offhandedly.

“I've tried that already.” Jongin admits, promptly ignoring the lifted eyebrow Sehun sends his way. “It's not the same as the real deal.”

“Then find some lonely girl and practice on her.”

The other’s frown deepens, “That's fucked.” 

Sehun hums, “True, but then, what other option is there?” He asks, a smile on his face, clearly amused at the whole situation.

Jongin mulls over it for a moment before he looks over at Sehun, a thought suddenly occurring to him. “You know, _we_ could always...” Jongin trails off, using a hand to wave in the space between the two of them. He hadn't meant to blurt it out so casually like that, but there wasn’t anything he could do about it now, the words already out in the open. Besides, it made perfect sense. They could learn how to kiss together. Kill two birds with one stone, or whatever.

But then Sehun isn’t smiling anymore, and Jongin knew he had to say something else, and fast.

(I'm kidding. I'm fucking with you.)

Both were good responses to diffuse the situation; to play this off as some stupid joke. What comes out of his mouth instead is, “It's not going to be forever, Sehun. Only until we get good. A way for us to practice so we're not completely lost when it comes down to the real thing. It's really no big deal.” He shrugs.

It's silent for a long time, and Jongin is mentally kicking himself, half expecting for Sehun to call him a freak and storm out. But then suddenly, Sehun is nodding, a slow bob of his head, voice soft as he mumbles, “Okay.”

Jongin blinks. He hadn't expected Sehun to give in so easily.  
  
“Okay?” Jongin asks hesitantly, searching Sehun's features for any warning signs, but the younger remains frozen still, glassy eyes staring at the television screen. Jongin knocks his knee against Sehun's carefully.  
  
The touch seems to break Sehun out of his trance, the boy’s eyes squeezing shut for a beat. He takes in a shuddering breath before reopening them.  
  
“Okay.” He says a little bit more firmly this time, head turning to finally look at Jongin.  
  
Sehun's eyes are wide, his adam’s apple wobbling nervously, so Jongin tries to smile a bit to break the tension. It comes out more like a grimace.  
  
This is fucked up.

They're _best friends_ for crying out loud, and best friends _don't_ _kiss_. Even if it's just for practice.  
  
Jongin should've just kept his big mouth shut, then everything would've been okay still.  
  
But then, Sehun's leaning into his space slightly, his pink tongue slipping out to run along his bottom lip shakily, and Jongin can't help it when his eyes drop to follow its movement.  
  
“One time only.”

Jongin nods, agreeing.

“Just to see.” Sehun continues.

“Of course.”  
  
“If you tell anyone-”  
  
“Why would I?” Jongin snorts, “Bragging rights?”  
  
“Shut up.”  
  
Sehun takes another deep breath and moves in closer. Jongin feels like he should say something else, maybe crack a lame joke to put the other at ease, but he's all but forgotten how to speak. Luckily, Sehun moves once more, scooting closer and cupping Jongin's cheek gingerly with one hand while the other grips Jongin's bicep for stability.  
  
Jongin is immediately very aware of how clammy Sehun's hands feel, and how he seems to be trembling just the tiniest bit. Twisting to reach out his own hand, Jongin gently grasps the back of Sehun's neck, his slender fingers threading through the dark hair found there.  
  
They lean in simultaneously until there is only a sliver of space in between them, their breath mingling and their gazes locked. After what seems to be hours, Sehun's eyes slip shut, and Jongin follows his lead as the last breath of space is closed.  
  
Sehun makes a noise in the back of his throat when their lips touch, small, and high-pitched, his grip on Jongin's arm tightening. They stay like that for a moment, unmoving, breaths held; simply reveling in the feel of another's lips pressed against their own.  
  
Jongin isn't sure who makes the first move, but suddenly their heads are tilting and their lips begin moving apprehensively. It's clumsy, a little too wet, and the angle is all wrong, but they work together to find a steady rhythm, eventually settling on one that's probably too slow, but it's comfortable.  
  
In the back of his mind, Jongin knows he's only getting this one chance. So in the interest of not wasting it, he gathers all his courage to carefully open his mouth. He isn't exactly sure what he’s doing, going off on the limited knowledge he’s earned from watching movies, but the image of Sehun's tongue running over his lip is burned into his memory, and his own tongue is soon sneaking out to mimic the action.  
  
There's a flutter deep in his chest when Sehun gasps softly at the touch, and Jongin's tongue accidentally slides against the inside of Sehun's lip.   
  
Nothing could prepare either of them for the feeling of another’s tongue on their own; sensual, slick and impossibly smooth. Sehun’s tongue shyly rubs against Jongin’s, the sensation intense enough to rattle Jongin to the bone. Jongin’s fingers grip at Sehun’s hair a little harder, tangling in the silky strands as he presses closer to Sehun’s mouth.  
  
It's when their teeth clack does the moment shatter like glass, reality rushing in to smack them in the face. They shoot away from each other, faces red and breathing ragged.  
  
“U-Uhhh,” Jongin drawls out, eyes locked onto the ground in front of him. What should he even say? Heck, he couldn't even bring himself to look at Sehun in the eyes.  
  
“A bit spitty...” Sehun says, voice quiet. Advice.  
  
“Oh. Sorry.”  
  
“But I think we get the idea, yeah?”  
  
“Yeah.” Jongin mutters. He can feel the awkwardness looming over them, the tense atmosphere slowly becoming suffocating. He can hear a commercial for car insurance playing on the television, tuned out until now.  
  
He should say something; he _needs_ to say something.  
  
“Sehun-” Jongin starts, but Sehun clears his throat loudly, cutting him off.  
  
“I'm gonna... go.” The younger boy announces and Jongin wants to argue, say that they still need to finish their homework, that he didn't have to leave, and, most importantly, he wanted to ask if they were okay.  
  
He doesn't say any of that, though. Instead, he finds himself nodding back.  
  
“Yeah, alright.”  
  
He watches as Sehun silently stuffs his things back into his bag before shuffling towards the door. He doesn’t look back once, just pauses to say, “See you tomorrow, I guess.” Sehun doesn’t wait for a reply, merely swings the door open and slips out.

-  
  
Jongin’s already sitting at his desk when Sehun enters the classroom the next morning. The younger is wearing a grey sweater that’s way too big for his small frame, the material reaching past the tips of his fingers. He’s bundled up in a tightly wound scarf, and a black beanie is pulled over his black hair.

The weather’s been changing gradually, a sign of the approaching holiday season. The air is crisp in the early morning, and late at night, but Sehun looks like he’s about to brave a whole snow storm. Jongin wants to poke fun a little bit, because that’s what best friends do, tease each other goodnaturedly. But all Jongin can do when he looks over at the other boy is recall the events from the previous day. He remembers how nice Sehun’s lips had felt against his, recalls the soft noises that the younger had made, and registers how his heart is suddenly beating faster than normal.

He wonders if Sehun will ignore him. Maybe they went too far yesterday; crossed a line that best friends should never cross, and made things awkward between each other. After all, Sehun had basically high-tailed it out of Jongin’s room afterwards, so it isn’t out of the realm of possibilities. Maybe Sehun decided that what they did was just too weird, and that they shouldn’t continue their friendship anymore.

Jongin can feel himself beginning to panic, so he tries to reassure himself that their bond is too strong to be broken over something so trivial. Either way, all Jongin can do is wait with bated breath as Sehun slips into the desk beside his. Sehun doesn’t say anything, just struggles for a moment to unknot the scarf around his neck, eventually managing to unwind it and then promptly ripping the beanie off his head.

“My mom wouldn’t let me leave the house without putting these things on me. Said she didn't want me to catch a cold. It’s not even that chilly outside yet.” Sehun mumbles. He looks up to see Jongin staring. “What?”

Jongin blinks. “N-Nothing.” Well, Sehun’s not ignoring him, so that’s good. “You kinda messed your hair up when you took the beanie off.”

“Oh?” Sehun runs a hand through his hair, “Is it okay now?”

Jongin shakes his head, “Nah, you missed a spot.” He says, and before he realizes what he’s doing, he’s leaning forward, reaching his own hand out to smooth out a few stray strands. The feeling of Sehun’s hair against his palm triggers _that_ memory again, of how he’d been holding onto the other’s locks for almost dear life, so lost in their kiss. Jongin blushes, quickly pushes those thoughts away, and leans back in his seat. “There, all good now.”

“Thanks.” Sehun says quietly, head turning to look at the front of the classroom as their teacher enters the room, but Jongin manages to catch a glimpse of red on the tip of the younger’s ear.

-

The next few weeks fly by without much change between them. Although, there are times when Jongin wonders if Sehun always had this habit of touching his mouth; fingertips pressing against his pink lips whenever he spaces out. Jongin wonders about it so much, that he inadvertently ends up doing it, too. But everything else was pretty normal, so maybe it wasn’t that big of a deal.

Mid-year exams are steadily approaching, a little more than a month away, so Jongin nudges Sehun as they’re packing their books up after their last class.

“Do you wanna come over and study for midterms with me?”

Sehun stops for a moment, suddenly remembering what happened the last time he’d gone over to study at Jongin’s. They never did talk about it, but then again, what was there to talk about? They were just practicing; nothing more. So, why couldn’t Sehun stop thinking about it? Why did he feel so nervous all of a sudden?

He looks up at Jongin, watches as the boy raises an eyebrow expectantly. Sehun finally caves, and agrees. He never could say no to Jongin.

They exit the classroom, shoulders bumping as they walk side by side towards Jongin’s house.

-

Jongin rubs his eyes with the heel of his palm. They’ve been going over their notes for Environmental Science for almost two hours now, and the words on Jongin’s sheet were beginning to merge and resemble gibberish, a tell-tale sign that he was in desperate need of a break. He looks over to where Sehun is seated next to him on the bed, back leaning on the wall, gaze locked onto his own notes. He’s still deeply concentrated, completely unaware that Jongin’s attention is now on him.

Jongin doesn’t mean to stare, but he can’t bring himself to look away. The orange and yellow rays of the setting sun leak through Jongin’s bedroom window, casting a warm glow on Sehun’s otherwise pale skin. It makes Sehun look… ethereal.  Sehun’s hand slowly raises up to his mouth, his index and middle finger gently poking and prodding at his plush bottom lip. And it’s like Jongin’s in a trance. He wants nothing more than to remove Sehun fingers and replace it with his own; wants to feel the skin against the pads of his fingertips, wants to feel those soft lips against his own again.

He’s so wrapped in his thoughts that he doesn’t notice Sehun calling out to him.

“You okay?” The younger asks, eyebrows knitted together in concern.

“Yeah…” Jongin manages to utter, voice sounding rough, like he’s parched. In a way, I suppose you could say he is. “I think we should take a break.”

Sehun sighs and stretches his arms over his head. “Mmm, that’s a good idea.” He closes his notebook and sets it aside. They turn to watch the television, but Jongin can’t focus on the images on the screen. He can only think about Sehun’s pink lips.

He turns back to Sehun, and the logical side of his brain is telling him to pump the brakes, to stop before he ruined everything. But just like last time, his mouth is much quicker, and the words just tumble out. “Hey, Sehun? You know that practice makes perfect right? You don’t become an expert with just one time. So if we want to get experienced in kissing, we need to practice some more.”

Sehun is totally blindsided. He never expected Jongin to ever break up that afternoon again, let alone say that they should practice more. He wants to mention the fact that they had agreed it’d be a one time only thing, but he loses all semblance of rationality when he witnesses Jongin’s eyes drop down to gaze at his lips, this sort of _hungry_ look buried in the depths of his dark orbs.

And Sehun thinks, ‘ _Fuck it._ ’ If Jongin wants to kiss him, then who is he to deny the elder that? And it’s not like Sehun is against the idea. On the contrary, he wanted to kiss Jongin just as much, maybe even more. He’s been replaying the memory of their first kiss every waking moment, attempting to recreate the lovely pressure of Jongin’s lips by pressing his fingers against his mouth, never coming close to it. And it’s scary. Scary that he can’t stop thinking about kissing his _best friend._ But that fear is pushed toward the back burner because Jongin is offering, and Sehun is greedy, swiping up the opportunity before it slips through his fingers.  
  
“Can’t argue with that logic.” Sehun mutters, wrapping his arms around Jongin’s neck and dragging the other down. He lets out a soft exhale as Jongin’s plump lips meets his and it feels nice, _so so_ nice. Jongin groans into his mouth; shifts to press Sehun further against the wall as his fingers dance around the younger’s waist, before finally settling on gripping at the front of Sehun’s shirt. 

Soon after, their ‘ _study sessions_ ’ became a weekly occurrence, excused under the pretense that they needed to be prepared for midterms. They didn’t have to talk about it. It was just something that became expected. They’d study for a bit to make sure their grades didn’t slip, else they arise suspicion, and then spend the rest of the afternoon glued to each other’s mouths, sharing kisses until the skies grew dark and Sehun had to go back home. At school, they didn’t do anything special. They acted the same. But when they were at Jongin’s, with the bedroom door locked and a television to be ignored, it was different. And although they had broken their ‘one-time rule,’ they kept their agreement of not telling anyone intact. So it became a secret; their own dirty, little secret.

-

“What are you gonna do over break?” Sehun asks one day during lunch.

Jongin’s munching on his ham and cheese sandwich (basic cafeteria food), and has the decency to swallow the food in his mouth before asking, “What break?”

Sehun gives him a look. “The winter one. In two weeks? What, did you forget?”

The elder shrugs, taking a swig of his water. “Hard to think about break when we gotta get through midterms next week first. But I think my mom mentioned something about going to visit my grandparents for the holidays. What about you?” He caps the bottle, waiting for Sehun’s response. But it doesn’t come. He raises his head to to regard the other, watches as Sehun stabs at his spaghetti uninterestedly. “What’s up? Not hungry?”

Sehun shakes his head, placing his fork down and messes with the strings on his hoodie. “It’s not that.”

“Then what’s wrong?” Jongin asks, concerned about the other’s sudden mood change.

“Forget it. It’s dumb.” Sehun turns his head, teeth chewing on his bottom lip.

Jongin leans over the table and pokes Sehun’s nose with his index finger. “Hey, stop that. You can tell me.”

Releasing his lip, Sehun lets out a sigh. “I guess I was just hoping we could hang out during our break. But you’re not even going to be in town.”

“Oh.” Jongin doesn’t know why, but he feels bad. “I’m sorry.”

Sehun waves a hand. “No, don’t apologize!” He smiles, “It’s totally fine. I know you don’t get to see your grandparents often, so this is a good opportunity to spend time with your family. I’ll see if Baekhyun and Chanyeol are free. You and I can always hang out later.”

Jongin nods, “Yeah. I’ll only be gone for two weeks.” He adds, but that detail somehow makes him a little sad. Two whole weeks without Sehun. The longest they’ve gone apart was one week when Sehun contracted Chickenpox in the fifth grade and had to be quarantined in his room. And that had been something akin to pure torture, with Jongin going out of his mind, missing his best friend’s presence. He puts his sandwich down. He’s no longer hungry.

It seems like Sehun shares a similar sentiment, because he’s back to chewing at his lip. After a few moments of quiet, Sehun speaks. “Promise you’ll call me everyday?”

Jongin grins. “Duh. Of course.”

Sehun grins back.

-

A few days later, and Sehun’s laying on his back in bed, cellphone pressed to his ear and eyes glued onto the old glow-in-the-dark stars stuck on the ceiling of his room. He can hear Jongin’s soft breathing on the other line, and Sehun basks in it, the small lull in the conversation neither stifling, or awkward. Comfortable, actually.

They’ve been talking for a while, Jongin telling Sehun about how he made gingerbread cookies with his grandmother, and Sehun explaining excitedly about how his parents let him pick out the Christmas tree.

Sehun knows they should hang up soon. It’s getting late, and judging by how the other’s breathing is beginning to slow, Jongin’s on the verge of falling asleep. But again, Sehun’s greedy, wants to take advantage of every single second. Because he misses Jongin. It’s stupid; he _knows_ Jongin will be back. But right here, right now, with Jongin hours away in another city, Sehun feels… empty. He wonders if Jongin feels the same.

Turning over onto his side, Sehun faces the wall, fingertip drawing abstract shapes on the surface as he asks, “Do you believe in soulmates?”

On the other line, Sehun can hear shuffling, as if Jongin’s moving into a more comfortable position. “ _Soulmates? Where did that come from?_ ” The question comes out mumbled, and Sehun feels kind of bad for keeping Jongin up. But he needs to get this off his chest.

Sehun shrugs, then realizes Jongin can’t see what he’s doing and says, “Just making conversation. I want to hear your opinion.”

Jongin’s silent as he thinks over his answer. “ _I think there’s someone made for you, so yeah_.”

“Really?”

“ _Yup_.”

“I do, too.” Sehun agrees. “But I was also thinking, that people can have other types of soulmates in their lives, too. Not just a soulmate that you marry and start a family with. I think a soulmate can also be someone that you can _be_ with. It doesn’t have to end up romantically, but just someone who makes you feel… whole.”

“ _Someone who completes you._ ” Jongin adds, “ _Who fills in your blank spots. Right?_ ”

Sehun nods, forgetting that Jongin can’t see him again. “Exactly.”

“ _So,_ ” Jongin hums, _“Now that you’ve gotten my opinion... You gonna tell me the real reason you’re asking me this?_ ”

Sehun flinches. “What makes you think there’s a reason?”

Soft laughter filters through the phone. “ _C’mon, Sehunnie. I think it’s about time we both learned that we can’t lie to each other. Now, tell me._ ”

A groan escapes Sehun’s lips. “Ugh, okay, _fine_. But you gotta promise you won’t laugh.”

“ _Promise_.”

Rolling over onto his back once more, Sehun looks over at the desk across his room, eyes landing on a picture frame. It’s a photo of him and Jongin during their middle school graduation. They have identical smiles on their faces, Jongin’s arm wound around Sehun’s as the elder rests his head on Sehun’s shoulder. “You,” He begins, voice hushed, “Make me feel whole.”

The line remains quiet.

“Sorry, that was weird, wasn’t it?” Sehun laughs, tries to ignore the weird pang in his heart at the lack of Jongin’s response.

“ _How do you know when you’ve found a soulmate?_ ” Jongin asks, sounding more awake all of a sudden. “ _How can you tell?_ ”

Sehun mulls it over, settling on, “I think your heart will feel complete.”

“ _And yours feels whole?_ ”

There’s a beat of hesitation, before Sehun admits, “When I’m with you, yes.”

“ _So, I’m your soulmate?_ ”

“Yeah, one of them.”

Jongin falls silent again. Then, “ _Well, I guess you’re one of my soulmates, too._ ”

“You guess?” There’s a hint of amusement in Sehun’s voice.

The elder sighs. “ _You know I’m not the best at explaining things._ ”

“Just try.”

“ _When you’re not around_ ,” Jongin starts, “ _I feel… weird. Like, I get these pains in my chest. I don’t know, maybe it’s just loneliness. But, can you really feel lonely when you’re not actually alone?_ ”

“What do you mean?”

“ _Take right now, for instance. I’m with my grandparents, my parents, and my sisters. All people who I love very much. But you’re not with me, and it physically hurts._ ”

“The same goes for me.” Sehun agrees quickly, “When I hung out with Baekhyun and Chanyeol yesterday at the skating rink, it just didn’t feel the same. I felt... empty.”

“ _So_ _when we’re together... how do you feel then?_ ”

“I’m happy. You always make me happy.”

“ _And you make me happy_ _. Always._ ” Jongin pauses. “ _L_ _ooks like we’re soulmates._ ” It sounds like Jongin’s smiling, voice light, and it makes Sehun giggle.

“Yeah. Looks like it.” Sehun contemplates for a moment, before whispering, “You don’t mind? Us being soulmates?”

“ _No, I don’t. Do you?_ ”

“Nope.”

“ _Good_.”

They talk a little more until Jongin’s mom enters Jongin’s room and tells him to get to sleep. Jongin and Sehun bid each other a good night and hang up, Sehun falling asleep with a flutter in his chest.

-

When Jongin arrives back in town on the first of January, the first thing he does is head over to Sehun’s. He doesn’t even give the other a heads up beforehand because he’s just too excited to be reunited with his best friend.

Sehun’s mom is the one who opens the door. She gives Jongin a warm smile and lets him inside, informing him that Sehun’s up in his room. Jongin thanks her and takes the stairs two at a time in his haste.

He knocks on Sehun’s door, and waits for it to be pulled open. The look of surprise on Sehun’s face is so funny, Jongin kinda wishes he had a camera.

Taking advantage of the younger’s shock, Jongin pushes Sehun inside the room, closes and locks the door behind them, before greeting Sehun with a kiss.

Sehun’s eyes widen. This is the first time Jongin’s kissed him outside the confines of Jongin’s room. To be honest, Sehun figured they’d no longer engage in this activity considering that midterms were over and they didn’t have the excuse of their ‘study sessions’ anymore. So, he’s incredibly confused. But Jongin’s lips are persistent, and Sehun would be stupid to let this chance escape, so he melts into the kiss, lets Jongin set the pace.

“I missed kissing you,” Jongin mumbles in between kisses. “Missed seeing you.” Another kiss. “Missed your smile.” Another. “Missed you. So much.” And another.

“Me too, me too.” Sehun babbles, returning every peck with as much fervor as Jongin is displaying.

Things were a little different after this. No longer was it just ‘study sessions,’ but now it was video games, and television, and movie nights, and comics -any time they were alone in Jongin’s room, or the kitchen or the living room when Jongin’s family were out of the house. They got in the habit of kissing hello and goodbye when no one was around. Fourteen years old became fifteen years old, and ninth grade became tenth, and things were good.

-

It’s October. Halloween is right around the corner, and Jongin and Sehun are getting into the spooky mood by having a horror movie marathon in Sehun’s room. (They’d started going to Sehun’s more when Sehun’s parents started to question why Sehun was always out of the house.)

Sehun lets out a yelp and buries his face in his hands as another jumpscare catches him off guard. Jongin chuckles, patting Sehun’s back gently. “I don’t know why you insisted on watching horror movies. You’re like, the biggest scaredy-cat.”

“Am not!” Sehun refutes, but his words come out muffled behind his hands, causing Jongin to laugh harder. The younger pulls back. “Stop laughing at me.” A pout is adorning his lips, and Jongin coos at the sight.

“Cute.”

Sehun flushes, and pouts harder. “Am not.” He repeats.

Jongin hums, moving to cup Sehun’s face in his hands. “Definitely cute.” He leans forward to press his lips against Sehun’s. It’s a small kiss, but it’s not long before Jongin’s swiping his tongue along Sehun’s bottom lip, causing excitement to bloom in Sehun’s chest.

They’d started experimenting with making out a few weeks ago, finding the addition of open mouths and curling tongues, a lot more enjoyable than the innocent pecks they were used to sharing.

Sehun makes a noise in the back of his throat when Jongin swipes his tongue against his, before pulling away, soft pants escaping their mouths as their gazes lock.

“I like this.” Jongin mutters, thumb circling on the apple of Sehun’s cheek.

Sehun’s eyebrows scrunch. “What? Watching horror movies?”

“No, silly.” Jongin snickers. “I meant, kissing you.”

Sehun bites his lip. “I like kissing you, too. But uh,” He starts to fidget, hands clasping together, then unclasping. He’s scared, but he needs to ask; needs to know. “What do you -er, does this…” He pauses, eyes glancing away. “What would you... call this?”

Jongin tilts his head. “This?” Sehun nods. Jongin doesn’t get it, not until Sehun hesitantly meets his gaze and motions between the two of them.

“Oh.” All of a sudden, Jongin’s heart is beating faster than before, hands growing sweaty, so he lets go of Sehun’s face lest the other feels it. “I-I… don’t think we should put label to it. It’d just makes things-“

“Complicated?” Sehun offers.

“Yeah.”

Sehun nods slowly. “Yeah. I get it.” He turns away, and a silence sets in between them, the air heavy.

“You’re okay with that, right?” Jongin asks, just to be sure.

Sehun shrugs, “Why wouldn’t I be?”

The answer rubs Jongin the wrong way, so he presses. “What would _you_ call this?”

“Whatever you wanna call it.”

“Friends?”

Another shrug.

“ _Best_ friends?”

The corner of Sehun’s mouth quirks ever-so-slightly.

“With benefits?” Jongin adds.

“I guess that’s what other people would call this.” Sehun scratches at his arm.

Jongin rests his head on Sehun’s shoulder. “I don’t care what other people think. I only care about what you have to say.”

Sehun lays his head on top of Jongin’s, sighing. “Then... What about an understanding?”

An understanding. Jongin thinks that’s probably the best word to use. They understood what they were to each other. They were best friends, soulmates; they didn’t have to get technical about anything else.

-

Time is constantly moving. Sehun and Jongin are now sixteen, and the spring semester of their Sophomore year is rolling around. The first period of the day is just beginning, and the teacher gathers everyone’s attention to announce that a new transfer student will be joining the class.

A girl enters the room and stands at the front; introduces herself as _Krystal_.

Sehun feels a shove to his shoulder, turns his head to see Jongin grinning at him, an eyebrow quirked up as he whispers, “Dude, isn’t she really pretty??” Sehun doesn’t even get a chance to reply before Jongin’s looking back at Krystal, a love-struck expression on his face.

There’s a nasty feeling growing in the pit of Sehun’s stomach, one that only worsens when Krystal is assigned the empty desk on Jongin’s other side, the girl sending Jongin a bright smile as she takes her seat. Jongin is quick to return it.

The only word that Sehun can think of to describe the itchiness under his skin is _‘jealousy.’_ But that doesn’t make any sense. There’s no reason for him to be jealous. He and Jongin aren’t exclusive. They’ve made it clear that they’re just friends. Best friends. With benefits. That’s it. Sehun isn’t Jongin’s boyfriend, and Jongin isn’t Sehun’s boyfriend. So Sehun runs this through his mind over and over as Jongin tells him he’s going to skip lunch to show Krystal around the school. He repeats it like a mantra as he sits at the lunch table with Baekhyun and Chanyeol, food tray pushed aside because he’s no longer hungry, heart feeling incomplete.

-

Months pass like the turning of a page in a book. It’s now late June, and summer is in full swing, blessing the days with longer daylight hours, and steadily rising temperatures.

With the end of the school year just around the corner, it means that it’s officially prom season. Posters advertising a ‘Night of a Thousand Lights’ are being hung up on the walls of the school’s walkways, showcasing this year’s prom theme and encouraging everyone to attend. Sehun, who’s never really been fond of school dances, (he skipped their Freshman prom) strides pass them without a second glance, and heads towards the cafeteria to get some food.

Baekhyun, Chanyeol, and Jongin are already seated at their usual table, along with Krystal. She and Jongin had quickly developed a close friendship, so she sometimes joins the quartet for lunch, much to Sehun’s displeasure. When she’s around, Sehun always ends up feeling very much like a fifth wheel. Now that Baekhyun and Chanyeol are dating, it’s like they’re in their own little word. Add that to how Jongin spends most of the break trying to make Krystal laugh and smile, Sehun is usually left alone, scrolling on his phone to pass the time.

It’s annoying that Jongin gives Krystal so much of his attention nowadays, but Sehun still prides himself on the fact that he shares something with Jongin that Krystal doesn’t. And that’s their alone time. He finds himself smiling when Jongin invites him over to his house after school, immediately agreeing.

That night, with _The Terminator_ playing in the background, Jongin finds himself on his back on the bed, head pushed back into his pillow, Sehun’s tongue in his mouth as the younger straddles his hips.

Sehun’s mouth and Sehun’s body heat, all feel so incredibly nice, but there’s something weird and twisty inside Jongin’s gut that doesn’t let him fully enjoy the sensations. He had invited Sehun over for another reason, and he knew he had to tell the younger about it, but he couldn’t help but hesitate.

Earlier that day, Krystal had asked him to go to prom with her. Apparently, she had been hoping Jongin would ask her, but as prom grew closer, and Jongin remained silent, she decided to take matters into her own hands. Jongin had said yes on the spot.

Though, now Jongin felt obligated to tell Sehun. Not to ask for _permission_ , per say, but… maybe, something like that. Jongin reminds himself about how this whole thing with Sehun got started, practicing so they could kiss a girl, and he was more than ready to experience that by this point. So he tentatively puts his hands on Sehun’s waist, Sehun jumping at the touch.

Jongin didn’t know where to start, so when Sehun pulls back to catch his breath, a string of saliva connecting their lips, Jongin blurts out in one swoop, “I’mtakingKrystaltoprom.”

Sehun sits back. “What?”

Jongin swallows dryly, before repeating himself, slower this time. “I-I’m taking Krystal to prom.”

“Oh.” Sehun blinks. “That’s… cool.”

For a second, Jongin thinks that’s the end of that, but then Sehun looks at him, then away, and climbs off his lap.

“H-Hey-”

“No, it’s fine.” Sehun shuffles over to sit on the edge of the bed, running a hand through his hair. It’s gotten pretty long, the locks hanging into his eyes a bit.

Jongin lifts himself up on his elbows, watching Sehun carefully. The boy looks so small, but Sehun is only a few centimeters shorter than he is. Last year, it had been an inch. “Sehun. C’mere.”

Sehun doesn’t look back when he says, “Nah, I wanna watch this.”

“What? Really?”

“Yeah. It’s a classic.”

“You didn’t care about watching _Ghostbusters_ last time, and that was a classic too.”

“Yeah, well, I care about this one.” Sehun mutters, sliding off the bed to sit on the ground, stretching his legs out.

Jongin tries not to feel disappointed. It’s probably a good idea that they focus on other activities aside from kissing. He didn’t want things to get weird between them.

-

No amount of convincing could make Sehun go to prom. Jongin, Baekhyun, and Chanyeol all tried. But they knew it was because Sehun didn’t want to go alone; Baekhyun and Chanyeol had each other, and Jongin was taking Krystal. So they eventually stopped.

When Jongin arrived at the gym where the dance was being held, Jongin was already sweating into the collar of his neatly ironed, black button down. He was nervous, and it didn’t help that the place was packed with students. It takes him a while, but he spots Krystal standing at the side with her friends.

She looks really nice, Jongin thinks. Her honey brown hair is curled in gentle waves, and she isn’t wearing a lot of makeup, but enough to accentuate her natural beauty. She’s wearing a red dress, nothing too fancy compared to some of the statement dresses other girls are donning, but it’s looks nice on her small frame. Jongin watches as she turns, notices him, her face lighting up as she waves him over, and Jongin takes a second to gather his nerve before walking over.

The night goes by pretty smoothly, in Jongin’s opinion. They dance together, drink terrible punch, and yell over the music to Baekhyun and Chanyeol. Towards the end of the prom, Krystal asks Jongin to join her outside for some fresh air. After walking for a bit, they find an empty bench and take a seat, talking quietly together as they stare up at the stars. And then Krystal’s looking at him expectantly, and Jongin thinks, this is it. And because he’s a gentleman, he asks, “Can I kiss you?” before, and she laughs, nodding.

They kiss, and she tastes like punch, but so did he, and he closes his eyes in relief when he realizes that it felt _natural_. Looks like all that practice paid off; he’d gotten the hang of kissing. He brushes a hand through her hair, and is startled by how long it is, so much longer than Sehun’s, and a lot more wavy.

Gingerly holding Krystal’s face in his hand, he deepens the kiss, going at it in earnest because if she doesn’t enjoy it after all that effort he put into learning, then he isn’t sure what he’d do. Krystal returns the kiss shyly, lips moving unevenly. 

Eventually they pull away, and she touches her thumb to her lip, and Jongin vaguely remembers how Sehun had done something similar. “Wow, Jongin...” She breathes out, a smile on her face. “Where’d you learn to kiss like that?”

Jongin couldn’t exactly say that he learned from his best friend, so he laughs awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck as he says, “I’m a natural, I guess.” She doesn’t question anymore, and when they return back to the gym, and Krystal meets back up with her friends, Jongin overhears her telling the other girls about their kiss; saying that he was a really good kisser.

Back in his room, Jongin pulls out his phone and brings up Sehun’s contact, typing out a text.

‘ _hey. u up?’_

_‘ **yup. how’d it go?’**_

_‘good. the punch was terrible tho.’_

_‘ **did you kiss her?** ’_

Jongin types out a simple ‘yea,’ pauses, types something else, deletes it, adds something else, then presses send.

‘ _yea. she wasn’t very good.’_

Jongin gets the next text as he’s slipping into his bed.

‘ _ **LOL**_ ’

-

Things changed again after prom. For the remainder of the school year, Krystal didn’t join them for lunch. She and Jongin didn’t hang out as much, either. But, they still greeted each other politely in class, so Sehun figured whatever happened between them wasn’t that major considering they ended in cordial terms.

The other change that happened was... pretty significant.

Jongin and Sehun still had their alone time together at one another’s houses, but now, there was an elephant in the room with them.

In retrospect, you could say it’s always been there, lurking in the corner; its presence only becoming more and more obvious as they grew older, until there was no more denying its existence. It presented a problem because there was just no justification for it. You could learn to kiss to be better at it for girls, but there was _absolutely_ no reason to jerk each other off. It wasn’t a transferable skill. And it’s not like they could just come out and say, _‘Hey, I really like having your tongue down my throat, but have you ever thought about touching my dick?’_ Not to mention there was also that whole ‘maybe I’m not as straight as I thought I was’ dilemma they had to figure out first. So they avoided it, in place of really obvious boners that they never talked about after their makeout sessions.

That is, until one day in August, things go astray.

-

Summer vacation is steadily coming to an end; only a few days of freedom left before their Junior year of high school begins. They’re in Jongin’s room, on the bed, Sehun in Jongin’s lap, hands gently grasping the elder’s throat and kissing him so hard, Jongin’s head is swimming. And Jongin feels different. Maybe it’s because of the heat, or maybe because Sehun had been forced to attend summer camp and they weren’t able to see each other for a while. Or maybe, maybe it’s because they’re both so hard that no amount of thinking about cold showers could make them calm down.

Jongin clutches onto the bottom of Sehun’s shirt and yanks it up before he can think better of it. He expects Sehun to stop him, but the boy merely breaks away from his lips to finish pulling the material off, tossing it off the bed. Jongin doesn’t mean to stare, but he can’t help it, sitting back to take a better look at the younger. Of course they’ve seen each other shirtless before, but not lately, and besides, that was the old Jongin, strictly ‘best friend’ Jongin, not the new ‘best friend with benefits’ Jongin who likes to push Sehun against the wall and kiss the living daylights out of him. So, he takes his time admiring.

Sehun’s gotten a lot taller, surpassing Jongin by an inch or two, and he’s still skinny, but if you take a closer look, you’d see the faint traces of abs beginning to develop on his stomach. His skin’s a little tanner, evidence of his time spent in the sun while away at camp, and his hair is still long, but dyed a nice shade of blond to change things up for the new school year.

He looks good, and Jongin would’ve smiled if he wasn’t so damn nervous all of a sudden. Sehun laughs softly, rubs at his shoulder, then says, “You too,” while tugging on Jongin’s shirt.

Jongin doesn’t even hesitate. He rips off his shirt and throws Sehun down on the bed, climbing over him and tangling his hands into blond stands as he stifles Sehun’s giggles with a kiss. In the back of his mind, he vaguely wonders why all this felt so easy. He didn’t have to practice with anyone else to practice with Sehun. Sehun’s warm hands smoothing down his back has him losing that train of thought before he can settle on an answer.

They fumble with removing their jeans and underwear, too shy to look at each other, Sehun staring up at the ceiling, and Jongin’s head resting on Sehun’s shoulder. Identical gasps escape their lips when their hands wrap around one another’s erections, precome serving as lube as they begin a slow rhythm. It isn’t long before they’re properly jerking each other off, arching into each other’s hands, Sehun letting out these adorable high-pitched moans, and Jongin can feel the sweat gathering at his temples. It lasts about three minutes. In their defense, they’d been hard for ages, and, it was the first time they’d been touched by anyone aside from themselves, and _god_ , did it feel amazing. Neither wanted it to end, but when Sehun came, body tensing and spilling over Jongin’s fist, Jongin sucked in a breath through his teeth and quickly joined him.

They didn’t look at each other until it was over, faces flushed and hair matted with sweat. They don’t say anything, and for second, Jongin thinks Sehun’s going to leave with another ‘See you at school.’ But it doesn’t come. Instead, Sehun laughs, and asks, “You got any tissues?” And, oh yeah, they’re covered in come. Jongin sits up and retrieves the tissue box from his nightstand, taking a few sheets for himself and handing some to Sehun.

They clean up, redress, and sit next to the each other on the edge of Jongin’s bed, until Sehun starts laughing again. He shakes his head. “I can’t believe we just did that.”

“Believe it, sweetheart.” Jongin tosses the soiled tissues into the trash bin by the bed. “Wanna play _Call of Duty_?”

Sehun tilts his head, thinking. Both their minds are churning with thoughts of this happening again in the future, of maybe even taking things further. They’ve heard blow jobs were pretty great, too.

Eventually, Sehun says, “Make it _Smash_ , and you’re on.” Jongin grins. 

-

“Hey, what are you doing Friday night?” Sehun asks while they’re walking home together after school.

It’s early November, and the air is incredibly frigid. Jongin shoves his hands into the pockets of his jacket to try to keep them warm, and hums, “Nothing. Why?”

Sehun shrugs. “Wanna catch a movie with me?”

Jongin shivers, notes how Sehun shifts closer, probably to share body heat. He smiles. “Sure.”

“Awesome.” The younger beams. “There’s this movie I really want to watch. It’s supposed to be really good.”

“Oh!” Jongin exclaims, bumping his shoulder against Sehun’s. “You know what we should do? We should invite Baekhyun and Chanyeol, too! It’s been a while since we hung out with them. What do you think?”  

The blond huddles deeper into his jacket, gaze locked onto the pavement as he mumbles, “Um, I was just planning on it being us.”

“Us?” Jongin lifts a brow, “Alone?”

A small nod. “Yeah.”

“But we’re always alone.” The elder snorts out a laugh, then asks jokingly, “You don’t get tired of that?”

Sehun turns to regard him sharply, expression blank. “No. Do _you_?” He asks. He looks kinda upset.

Jongin stumbles over his feet, startled by the intense look the other is giving him. He stutters, “N-No! I just- I don’t want you to get tired of just hanging out with me. Figured having some other people tag along would make things more… lively?”

Sehun’s face doesn’t change. “If that’s what you want. I’ll text Baekhyun.”

They walk in silence for a few minutes, Jongin chewing on his lip as thoughts run through his head. “Wait, no.” He blurts out, “I take it back.”

“It’s fine.” The younger shakes his head, “No big deal.”

“C’mon, just hang on for a second.” Jongin bemoans, reaching a hand out to grab Sehun’s shoulder, halting him. “You’re right.”

“Right about what?” Sehun’s forehead creases, confused.

“About keeping it at just us. I mean, with Baekhyun and Chanyeol joining, it’d be like…” He trails off.

Sehun doesn’t miss a beat, uttering, “A double date.” Jongin nods, watches as Sehun smiles, and resumes walking. “Alright, then.”

Later that night, when Jongin’s lying in bed, about to go to sleep, he realizes that he had inadvertently referred to their outing as a date. Which is probably one of the stupidest things he’s ever done. Because he and Sehun don’t go on _dates_. Because they’re not _dating_.

Suffice to say, Jongin doesn’t get much sleep, tossing and turning, haunted by what he said. There’s also that lingering question of why Sehun didn’t point it out and correct him.

-

The movie starts at seven, so Jongin makes his way to Sehun’s at six, donned in baggy sweats and a hoodie, a beanie over his messy hair. He’s taken aback when Sehun opens the door, dressed in a long-sleeved button up, with a grey, wool overcoat on top. He’s wearing a pair of black jeans that look new, and his hair is neatly styled. Jongin suddenly feels extremely underdressed.

He doesn’t know what to say, so he eventually settles on an awkward, “Um, you look nice.”

“You look…” Sehun looks at him from head to toe, “Comfortable.” He walks down the door stoop and brushes past Jongin. “C’mon. Movie’s starting soon.”

Jongin exhales, and shuffles over to Sehun’s car.

They make it to the theater in time, and Jongin’s thrown for a loop, because as soon as they step out of the car, it’s like Sehun’s glued to his side. And he’s not sure if he’s imagining it or not, but he thinks that Sehun tried to hold his hand on more than one occasion.

And when they walk up to the box office to purchase tickets, Sehun practically shoves his money at the worker before Jongin can even take his wallet out of his pocket.

“You didn’t have to pay for me.” Jongin tells him once they walk into the building.

Sehun smiles as he says, “It’s okay. Movie’s were my idea, anyway.”

“Still…”

The younger only shrugs, and heads to their auditorium.

The movie’s about a woman whose husband and daughter are murdered, and she sets out on getting revenge on the people responsible. It’s intense; action-packed, and normally Jongin’s all for that, but he finds himself not really paying attention anymore, more concerned with how Sehun lifts up the armrest between them and basically cuddles into his side. It feels weird. They’ve always been a bit touchy, but only in the comfort of each other’s rooms, never really in public. He doesn’t say anything, though.

The ride back is uncomfortable, to say the least. Or maybe, it’s only uncomfortable for Jongin. Sehun tries to make conversation, talking about some of the scenes from the movie that he particularly liked, but Jongin doesn’t say anything, merely nods his head to make it appear like he’s listening. His mind is muddled with a million thoughts.

Sehun insists on driving him home, so now here they are, standing in front of Jongin’s front door.

“So, I’ll see you tomorrow?” Jongin asks, shuffling his weight from one foot to another.

“Yeah. I’ll text you.”

“Okay.”

Silence sets in. Jongin isn’t sure what to do now, but looks like Sehun does, because the boy leans in and gives Jongin a peck on the lips. Jongin, obviously surprised, doesn’t react. They’ve _never_ kissed out in the open like this, and it scares him. Before he can even think to do something, _anything,_ Sehun’s pulling back, clearing his throat. “Um, have a good night.

“Yeah. You, too.”

Then Sehun’s leaving, and Jongin feels like he can finally breathe again.

They don’t talk about that night, and when New Year’s Eve arrives, things are practically back to normal. Or, as normal as they can get.

-

“What is that?” Sehun asks, eyeing the bottles that Jongin is holding.

“Malt liquor, I think.” Jongin closes his bedroom door, locks it, before padding across the room to sit next to Sehun on the ground by the bed. He picks up a bottle and cracks it open, handing it over to Sehun.

The younger takes it gingerly. “Is it good?” He eyes the liquid inside suspiciously.

“Supposed to be, yeah.” Jongin replies as he open his own drink.

Sehun gives him a look. “How’d you even get it?”

The elder winks and makes a zipping motion over his lips. Sehun rolls his eyes. Jongin raises his bottle, and Sehun rolls his eyes once more, but clinks their bottles together anyway before taking a swig at the same time. The alcohol burns as it slides down their throats, but it tastes good enough.

They start off their New Year’s celebration by playing video games, because why not. Their shoulders and knees bump incessantly as they get really into their game of Mario Party, and Sehun nearly knocks over his third bottle of liquor in his displeasure when he loses another minigame to Jongin, the latter laughing at his misfortune.

They stop playing when the the images on the television screen begin to blur, the effects of the alcohol starting to become known.

Picking up his phone, Jongin squints at the glare and checks the time. It’s a quarter to midnight.

“Hey, are we gonna watch the ball drop?” He asks.

“Yeah, sure.”

They flick through the channels and find the one that’s broadcasting _Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve._ They watch as the final performances of the night take the stage, heads bobbing as they sing along to the songs.

Soon, it’s two minutes to midnight, and Sehun’s shuffling to sit sideways. Jongin’s confused for a second, but when he sees the expectant look in Sehun’s eyes, he turns, too, so they’re face-to-face.

Jongin’s eyes keep darting between the clock on the screen, and Sehun’s gentle smile. When 11:59 shows up, he scoots closer, knees pressing against Sehun’s. They don’t say anything, just sit quietly, motionless. The announcers on the television start the ten second countdown, and when they exclaim, _“HAPPY NEW YEAR!”_ Sehun leans in, only to be taken aback when Jongin’s mouth finds his first and kisses him deeply.

Sehun feels the elder’s hands on his waist, can hear as Jongin shifts up to his knees, and before Sehun can get a grip on the situation, he finds himself lying flat on his back, Jongin in between his legs. Sehun feels a little dizzy, and he thinks maybe it’s because of the alcohol in his blood. Or maybe it’s because Jongin’s weight is solid, putting pressure on certain areas on his body that has him squirming.

“I’ve never had someone to kiss at midnight.” Jongin mumbles against his lips.

“Yeah?” Sehun breathes out. “Me either.”

Jongin chuckles. “I can see the appeal. It’s nice.”

Sehun can only hum in agreement because Jongin’s swooping down again, nipping at his plump bottom lip, licking into his mouth. Sehun rakes his down Jongin’s sides, hips canting up, and Jongin moves with him, grinding down against him, and Sehun’s feels lightheaded.

Jongin’s hand wanders in between their bodies, palm pressing against Sehun’s crotch, massaging him, and it only takes a few strokes to have Sehun babbling incoherently, body trembling as he claws at Jongin’s shirt.

“Can I try something?” Jongin asks, voice low and deep, and Sehun would probably find it hot if he wasn’t so lost in the pleasure that he almost misses the other’s words.

Sehun bites his lip, nods furiously. Jongin pops the button to his jeans, and Sehun hears the metallic sound of his zipper being pulled down. Sehun lifts his hips so Jongin can pull his pants down, followed by his underwear, and Sehun’s feeling so exposed. It only lasts for a beat, though, because in the next moment, Jongin’s got his mouth on Sehun’s cock, and Sehun’s choking out a moan, hand coming up to tangle in Jongin’s hair.

The wet heat of Jongin’s mouth feels like absolute heaven; the pleasure increasing ten-fold when Jongin bobs his head slowly, using his hand to stroke what his mouth couldn’t take. Pulling back, Jongin licks over him with the flat of his tongue before diving back in, and the muscles in Sehun’s thigh quiver. It’s much more intense than the few messy hand jobs they’ve traded, and Sehun can feel the telltale signs of his quickly approaching orgasm.

“J-Jongin,” He whines, tugging at the boy’s hair, eyes clenched tightly. Jongin gives him one last suck before using his hand to stroke Sehun, and then Sehun’s coming, hot and thick over his belly.

Jongin gives him a lopsided grin. “How was th-“ He’s cut off when Sehun shoves him over, elbows colliding with the ground harshly, but the pain barely registers because Sehun’s working at removing his clothing, a devilish smirk on his face.

“My turn.” He says simply, winks, then goes down on Jongin, the elder’s eyes rolling back as a groan escapes his lips, body falling to lie back.

-

They go to their Junior prom together. Kind of. Sehun had asked Jongin a few hours before the event began if was taking Krystal again this year, and when Jongin said no, he said, “I think I’ll go.” Jongin had shrugged, and replied, “I think I’ll go, too.”

So they show up to the gym together, wearing t-shirts, and jeans and beat-up sneakers. They sit side-by-side at the back of the bleachers, watching the other students dance below, and jamming together to the thumping music.

Sehun lifts his cup of punch up to his lips and takes a sip, face immediately contorting as the liquid touches his tongue.

Jongin snickers. “Told ya. Punch’s terrible.”

“You weren’t kidding.” Sehun mutters, placing his cup down next to him with a frown.

A loud yell of _‘Hey!’_ cuts through the music from down below, and they turn to see Baekhyun and Chanyeol smiling up at them. They weren’t as close with the duo as they’d been when they first began high school, namely because Sehun and Jongin were busy shoving their tongues down each other’s throats, and because of the secrecy that went along with that. But Baek and Chanyeol were still their closest friends, so they immediately wave them over, the couple bounding up the bleachers to join them.

Sehun coos when he notices their outfits. They’re dressed in matching grey suits, a white rose boutonniere attached to the left lapel of their jackets. “Well, aren’t you guys adorable.”

“Shut up.” Baekhyun giggles, a cute shade of pink on his cheeks as Chanyeol rubs the back of his neck shyly. “I can say the same to you two. You’re looking pretty fucking cozy up here by yourselves.” He jokes, but he doesn’t miss the way Sehun and Jongin look away at the same time.

“Nah.” Jongin motions over to their cups of punch, “Just drinkin’.”

“Honestly,” Chanyeol speaks up, taking a seat on the step below, Baekhyun following suit. “I’m surprised to see you here, Sehun. You flaked for both our Freshman and Sophomore proms. Figured you’d do the same for this one.”

Sehun lets his head loll back against the wall. “Thought I’d give it a shot.”

“Huh,” The shorter boy huffs out, “And what about you, Jongin? Going stag this year?”

Jongin shrugs, “Yup.” He says, popping the ‘p’ obnoxiously.

“And you guys are just gonna spend the whole night up here?” Baekhyun shakes his head, “Unacceptable!! You’re gonna join us on the dance floor.” He stands up, latching onto Sehun’s arm.

“Whoa, hey! There’s no way in hell I’m dancing!” Sehun tries to shrug Baekhyun off, but the boy’s persistent.

“I’m not letting your first prom experience be just you drinking shitty punch. You gotta live a little.”

Sehun looks over at Jongin for help, eyes wide, but the elder only laughs. “Sorry, dude. I’m with Baek on this one.” Sehun glares at him, and with help from Chanyeol, Baekhyun’s dragging Sehun down the bleachers, Jongin following behind with a grin.

It takes a while, and a lot of coaxing from the other three, but Sehun eventually gives in and lets loose. They dance as a group, hyping each other up and laughing whenever one of them stumbles over their own feet; just generally having a good time.

But, it’s when the songs start to slow down, the lights dimming as everyone begins to couple up, that Sehun starts feeling out of place. He watches as Baekhyun and Chanyeol smile at one another before embracing, gently swaying to Savage Garden’s _Truly Madly Deeply_. He hesitantly looks over at Jongin, notices the elder shuffling awkwardly, gaze on his feet. There’s something pressing against Sehun’s chest, making it hard to breath. He wonders if maybe someone’s spiked the punch; being under the influence of alcohol being the only explanation he can think of for how he suddenly craves to have Jongin wrap him up in his arms, to dance with him like all the other couples around them. Before he can let that hidden desire breakthrough, however, he walks over to Jongin and taps him on the arm. Jongin’s head snaps up to regard him. He looks uneasy.

“I think I should get home.” Sehun tells him over the music, notices how Jongin’s shoulders untense, feels a wave of disappointment.

“Yeah, okay.” He nods. “I’ll walk with you.” Sehun nods back. They contemplate bidding Chanyeol and Baekhyun goodbye, but neither want to interrupt them, so they just exit the gymnasium.

The night air is still pretty warm considering it’s well into June. The streets are empty, and the sky is clear, stars glistening above them as silence stretches between them.

Jongin stuffs his hands into the pockets of his jeans, clears his throat. “So… was that as bad as you thought?” He asks, peering over at Sehun.

Sehun cracks a smile. “No.”

“Good.”

They don’t say anything else. Just two seventeen year old boys walking down the sidewalk in the dead of night, the only light coming from scattered lamp posts, thoughts swimming in both their heads.

It isn’t long before they’re standing in front of Sehun’s home, and much like that night when they went to the movies, they’re just staring at each other. And also just like that night, it’s Sehun who moves first. But this time, Jongin meets him halfway, palm sliding against Sehun’s cheek as he presses their lips together. It’s short, but nice.

They part, Sehun biting at his lip to suppress a smile. “Thanks for accompanying me to prom. And for walking me home.”

Jongin rubs his thumb on the other’s skin, lets his hand drop. “No problem. I’ll see you?”

“Yeah. Get home safe.”

Jongin smiles, turns and walks away. Sehun lingers at the door, watching until he can’t make out Jongin’s form any longer. Unlocking his house, he steps inside, shutting the door behind him.

-

It’s two weeks later that Sehun finds himself backed into the corner of Jongin’s room, Jongin standing behind him, pressing wet kisses along the back of his neck. The elder had mentioned seeing something in a porn video that he wanted to test out, and rather than ask questions, Sehun had immediately said yes. He briefly thinks about how just a few years ago Jongin had asked him to try out kissing, and now here he was, bracing himself against the wall, and bending over, breath hitching as he feels Jongin’s hard cock brush against his ass.

“Is this okay?” Jongin asks. He’s breathing pretty hard, probably from all the kissing and heavy petting they were doing prior to this. Sehun nods frantically, but Jongin doesn’t move. “I need to hear you say it.”

The younger doesn’t even hesitate, sputtering, “It’s okay, it’s okay.”

“Press your legs together.”

Sehun does as he’s told, fingers scraping at the surface in front of him as the slick head of Jongin’s cock slips between his thighs, sliding along the underside of his balls when Jongin leans forward. He moans; it feels a lot better than what he was expecting.

Jongin’s first few thrusts are slow, experimental. He knows he’s found the right angle when Sehun gasps, ass pressing further back, so he grips the younger’s hips to keep him in place as he picks up the pace. One of Sehun’s hands come up to cover his mouth, to stifle the noises he makes every time Jongin’s cock rubs against his own because Jongin’s parents are home, just in the other room.

A low groan escapes Jongin when Sehun clamps his thighs tighter together, providing more friction, precome easing the way. Lifting a hand up from Sehun’s hip, he rolls his thumb over Sehun’s nipple. Sehun whines, loud, even from behind his hand, so Jongin tuts, “Shh, you gotta be quiet. My parents will hear.” He pinches at the nub, and Sehun shoves his hand harder against his mouth, eyes squeezing shut.

Jongin continues fucking Sehun’s thighs, panting harshly from the exertion, the sounds making the latter blush scarlet. “I’m… c-close.” He mutters against Sehun’s ear. Sehun’s face and chest push into the wall when he reaches his free hand down to where Jongin’s dick is, letting his fingers push against the head with every thrust. The extra stimulation has Jongin’s hips stuttering, a grunt of Sehun’s name leaving his lips as he comes into Sehun’s hand.

Jongin removes himself from Sehun’s thighs and turns the younger around to bite bruises on the pale expanse of Sehun’s chest. His works his mouth over to the boy’s left nipple, encasing the bud in wet heat, Sehun arching up with a groan. Sehun lets his hand wander down to his cock, jerking himself off in quick motions, and when Jongin leans up to mold their lips together, tongue slipping into the blond’s mouth, Sehun falls over the edge easily. He whimpers against Jongin’s mouth as he releases.

After they clean up and redress, they lie in bed together. It’s harder now, considering they’re both tall, with broad shoulders and long limbs. But they make it work, resting on their sides, facing one another.

Sehun’s the one who speaks up first, saying, “Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, sure.”

Sehun dithers. Then, finally whispers, “What are we?”

“Is that a trick question? We’re just a couple of guys.” Jongin laughs. Sehun doesn’t join him.

“That’s not what I meant.”

Jongin lifts an eyebrow, “Then what?”

“Us. Together. What are we together?”

Jongin’s heart begins hammering against his ribcage. “Oh.” He clears his throat, “We already talked about this, Sehun.”

“Yeah, I know. But, I’m not…” Sehun swallows roughly, “I’m not okay with that.”

Sitting up suddenly, Jongin looks at him intently, “What are you saying?”

Sehun avoids his gaze. “Being friends with benefits. I’m not okay with it. I know you said didn’t want to put labels on this because it’d complicate things-”

“And you agreed!” Jongin cuts in.

“No,” Sehun shakes his head, “I didn’t. I went with it. There’s a difference.”

“Why would you-!“ Jongin stops, lowering his voice because he realizes he was on the verge of yelling, “Why would you just _go with it_? We’re supposed to be able to talk to each other about everything!”

Sehun moves to sit up. “Well, I’m talking now. And I’m saying I don’t want to be friends with benefits anymore. I want to make things official.”

“Why?” Jongin ducks his head, tilting his body away. His voice sounds weak. “What happened to all that soulmate talk? You said that people could have other types of soulmates in their lives, ones who didn’t end up romantically, and that I was one of those! What changed?”

“Nothing changed.” Sehun clarifies, “When I said that, I meant a friend. And yeah, you’re my best friend. But you gotta face it, Jongin. What we’re doing isn’t _normal_. Friends don’t kiss, or make each other come. They don’t go on dates-“

“We’ve never went on a date.”

“Did you forget when we went to the movies?” Sehun gives him a look, “You even said with Baekhyun and Chanyeol joining it be like a double date.”

Ah, that explains why Sehun was acting so different that night; he legitimately thought it was a date.

“That was a mistake.” Jongin blurts out. Sehun merely stares, the corners of his mouth pulled down in a frown. His eyes are turning a little red, and he blinks a few times, and Jongin feels awful so he reaches out to touch the younger’s arm, but Sehun immediately pulls away. “Sehun…”

“Did you _ever_ consider the possibility of feelings developing?” Sehun interjects, voice cracking. “Did you ever think that I could maybe fall in love with you?”

Jongin’s eyes grow wide, “You-“

“Yes, Jongin,” Sehun sniffles, tears beginning to fall that he quickly swipes away. “I’m _in_ love you. You understand now, right? Why I’m not okay with this anymore? Why I don’t want to settle for just being your fuck buddy?” He throws his legs off the side of the bed and stands up. “But if you don’t want that, if you don’t feel the same, then fine. We can go back to how things were before any of this shit started.” He turns, and he’s already at the door when Jongin finds his voice again.

“Wait.”

Sehun pauses, only for a second. “It took time to develop these feelings, and it’s gonna take time to get over them. So, just give me some time, okay? That’s all I ask for.” He opens the door, and makes his way down the hall.

Jongin breaks out of his stupor when he hears the front door closing shut, falling back into bed, and curling into himself. He feels winded, like he was just punched in the gut, his head screaming at him, _you know you love him back_. _Why did you push him away?_

He knows the reason why.

He just refuses to acknowledge it.

-

Days turn to weeks, and before Jongin knows it, it’s been three weeks since he’s heard from Sehun. He tries not to let it get to him, tries to enjoy his summer vacation the best he can. He plays the video games he never got around to, checks out potential universities, and even helps his mother around the house. The woman is grateful, smiling as Jongin asks if there’s anything else she needed help with. “No, sweetie. You’ve already helped so much.”

Jongin rocks on his heels. “Are you sure? I don’t mind doing more.”

His mother ruffles his hair, “I’m sure. You should go and get some fresh air, you’ve been cooped up inside for too long. I heard on the radio that the firework festival is tonight. Didn’t Sehun mention that he wanted to attend it? Why don’t you two go?”

Jongin’s heart drops at the mention of his best friend. Hell, he’s not even _sure_ if they’re still best friends. “He’s… busy.” He lies, rubbing at his arm.

“Oh, did he go to summer camp again? Is that why he hasn’t been around?” She asks, and Jongin’s too afraid to tell the truth, so he just nods. “Ah, that’s too bad. You two are always together, I’ve gotten used to seeing him. I miss him.” She laughs softly, and Jongin’s chest feels tight. He misses him, too.

Another two days pass, and he’s lying in bed, binge-watching episodes of _Criminal Minds_ while chowing down on a variety of snacks. He’s just about to start another episode when he hears his sister outside of his door, yelling that he has a guest.

“Who is it?” He asks, jumping out of bed, nearly face-planting when his legs get tangled in his blankets. His heart is beating uncontrollably, and his palms are sweaty.

“It’s Baekhyun.”

“ _Baekhyun?_ ” He doesn’t mean to sound so disappointed, but it’s too late.

“Well, damn,” Baekhyun mutters from the otherside of the door. “I’ll just leave then.” He doesn’t, and when Jongin swings open the door, he shuffles in. “Expecting someone else?”

“No.”

The shorter boy makes a noise in the back of his throat, like he doesn’t believe him, but doesn’t delve any deeper. “When’s the last time you left your room?” He asks, picking up one of the many empty bags of chips on the ground, then adds, “Bathroom breaks don’t count.”

Jongin makes a face. He walks over to his bed and sits on the edge. “Are you here to question my living habits, or is there another reason?”

Baekhyun tosses the bag in the wastebasket. “Can’t a friend visit without having some ulterior motive?” Jongin’s expression doesn’t change. “Alright,” Baekhyun lifts up his hands, “You caught me. I came to ask why you and Sehun aren’t talking.”

Startled, Jongin stammers, averting his gaze. “W-What makes you think that?”

“I know things.” The boy lowers himself next to him. “And I know that Sehun refuses to hang out whenever me or Chanyeol asks, and whenever either of us mention you, he suddenly has something to do. Plus,” He looks around the room, frowning, “Judging by the state of your room, I think it’s safe to say you haven’t been out to see him. And you two are _never_ without one another.”

Jongin shrugs a shoulder, picking at the material of his shorts. “Yeah, well, now we are. It’s no big deal.”

“If it’s no big deal, then you can tell me, right?” Baekhyun tilts his head, “What happened?”

Suddenly, Jongin feels as if he has a mouthful of sand, throat dry and finding it impossible to speak. He wants to tell someone, to relieve this terribly heavy weight from his shoulders before he collapses. But he doesn’t know how to even begin. How does he tell his friend that he’s in love with his best friend? And that he’s afraid? Afraid of messing things up between them, worse than the damage already inflicted?

“Jong-“

“We kissed.” Jongin spills. Baekhyun’s eyes widen. “Well, we did a lot more than just kiss.”

“Wait- what?”

“Yeah.”

“You had sex?” Baekhyun’s tone is almost shrill.

“What? _No._ ” Jongin bites his lip, then, “Not… actual sex anyway.”

Baekhyun stops him with a hand to his chest. “Hold up. You two had not-sex, and you’re just now telling me?” He lifts his hand, and brings it back down. Hard. Jongin winces. “How long ago was this?”

“It… wasn’t a one time thing.” Jongin braces himself for another hit. Which he immediately receives.

“Oh my god, you guys are dating?”

Jongin feels his stomach drop. “No.”

“Let me get this straight,” Baekhyun starts, “You’re _not_ dating, you’re having _not-sex_ , and now you’re _not_ talking.” He nods to himself, “Okay, I see the problem now.”

Jongin lifts an eyebrow. “You do?”

Baekhyun sighs. “I think so, but, why don’t you start from the beginning?”

And so Jongin does. He explains how it all started (“ _just a practice kiss”_ ) and how it managed to escalate from a completely platonic friendship into friends with benefits, then into some kind of dating ( _“but not really”_ ) relationship. And then he may or may not go into extreme detail about the first time they _really_ messed around and-

“Okay, okay,” Baekhyun interrupts, “I get it. Get back on track.”

“Right.” Jongin has the good graces to look sheepish. “Anyway, it was all good… until Sehun brought up actually making things official.”

“So, he wants to be your boyfriend?”

“Yeah.”

“And you don’t want to be his?”

“I do,” Jongin answers truthfully. “It’s just,” He groans, crossing his arms over his chest and ducking his head, “It’s just too much, y’know? If something were to happen between us… if things don’t work out, it could fuck up our entire friendship. And then what? How do we fix things after that?”

Wrapping an arm around Jongin’s shoulders, Baekhyun says gently, “I know it’s scary. But, I also know that you and Sehun have this special bond, something I haven’t seen before. It’s like you two are parts of a whole.” (Jongin hears Sehun’s voice in his head, “ _You make me feel whole.”_ He curls in further into Baekhyun’s side.) “Besides, nothing has ever come between the two of you.”

“Maybe…” Jongin shrugs again, “But this is a lot different, though.”

Baekhyun pulls back and takes Jongin’s hands in his. “Listen, even if something were to happen, I really doubt Sehun would just leave. He just isn’t Sehun when you’re not around, and the same goes for you. So, you shouldn’t be afraid of what’s _going to_ happen, because you don’t _know_ what’s going to happen. The mystery is part of life.”

A bitter smile makes its way onto Jongin’s lips. “Well, aren’t you just filled with wisdom.”

The elder grins, “That’s because I know what I’m talking about. Been there, done that, and all that jazz.”

Jongin smiles for real this time, thinks about Chanyeol. “How are you guys doing?”

“Great. Perfect.” There’s a dopey look in Baekhyun’s eyes.

“I’m happy for you.”

“You could be happy for yourself, too, y’know?” Baekhyun presses. “Stop worrying so much about the future, and let yourself enjoy the here and now. And right now, you two are hopelessly in love with each other, but instead of being happy together, you’re both moping around and being miserable.”

Jongin scoffs, “Doubt that. He’s probably over me already.”

“Trust me,” He punches Jongin’s arm softly, “That boy’s still very much into you. Just like you’re into him. So, do me and yourself a favor and go talk to him.”

“What, right now?”

Baekhyun rolls his eyes, “No, next year.”

“Shut up.” Jongin mutters. And then pulls Baekhyun into a tight hug. Baekhyun laughs, returns the embrace and pats the boy’s back. “Sorry.” Jongin releases him with an embarrassed smile, eyes glistening with tears.

“It’s okay. Tell me how everything goes, okay?”

Jongin agrees, walks Baekhyun out, then returns to his room. He needs to change and brush his hair before he goes anywhere. Once he deems himself presentable, he makes his way out of the house.

-

Sehun’s house is only a few blocks away, so Jongin find himself standing in front of the door in a matter of minutes. His hands are shaking from the nerves, but he’s made up his mind that he isn’t going anywhere without clearing things up with Sehun. So he rings the doorbell, and waits.

Sehun’s mother opens the door, a smile on her face. “Oh, hi Jongin.”

“Hello, Mrs. Oh.” Jongin bows to her, then asks, “Is Sehun in?”

“Yes, he’s in his room.” She places a hand on Jongin’s shoulder, voice lowering, “He’s been holed up in there for weeks. Do you happen to know what happened? He refuses to tell me anything.” She looks concerned, and Jongin feels guilty.

“I do. But don’t worry, I’ll fix things.” He promises with a firm nod.

She pats Jongin once and lets her hand drop. “I won’t pry. But if you say you’ll fix things, I know you will. I trust you.” She gives him another smile and steps aside to let Jongin inside. He makes his way to Sehun’s room, and knocks on the wood of the door twice. There’s some shuffling in the room, and then the door is slowly opening.

“Mom, I already said I’m fin-“ Sehun stops, eyes wide as he finds not his mother, but Jongin on the other side of the door. The boy opens his mouth, but before he can say another word, Jongin beats him to it.

“I take it back. All of it.”

Sehun’s eyebrows knit together, confused. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t wanna be how we used to be.” Jongin explains, “And I don’t want us to be just friends with benefits either.”

Sehun pulls Jongin inside his room, closes the door behind him, and asks, “Then what do you want?”

Jongin’s response is prompt. “You.”

“Me?”

“Only you.” Jongin whispers.

Sehun can’t believe his ears. “Does that mean…”

“Yes, I wanna be your boyfriend.”

“What changed your mind?”

Jongin shuffles a little closer. “Someone helped me put things into perspective.”

The corner of Sehun’s mouth quirks up. “Let me guess. Baekhyun?” Jongin nods. “Figures. He kept hounding me, too.” He sits down on his bed, pats the spot next to him. Jongin follows suit. “How did he help?”

“He made me realize that I’m not happy without you. I was alone, and miserable, like I was missing a part of me.” He reaches out for Sehun’s hand, presses forward when Sehun doesn’t recoil, and links their fingers together. “Deep down, I’ve always known that. Just like I‘ve known that I’m in love with you. But I was just so fucking scared. Scared of something happening and messing everything up between us. I was so focused on the what-ifs, that I pushed you away before even giving us the chance to make this work. And I’m sorry, _so so_ sorry. For being an idiot. For making you cry. For everything.” He squeezes Sehun’s hand, “But I’m ready now. I’m ready to make things official. I _want_ to be your boyfriend. And I want you to be mine. That is, if you still want me.”

He runs out of breath.

He runs out of more when Sehun rushes forwards and kisses him, free hand cradling his jaw.

When Sehun speaks against his mouth, he sounds just as emotional as Jongin feels. “Of course I fucking do.” His face is bright. “This has been _hell_. I was trying to get over you but I just kept thinking about you the entire time, and it fucking hurt. It was torture.” He presses their foreheads together. “So, don’t do that anymore, alright? Don’t run away because you’re scared. Don’t run away from me.”

Jongin nods, wraps his arms around Sehun’s frame. “I won’t. I promise.”

-

They go to their Senior prom together. This time, as a couple.

They wear matching navy blue suits, and Sehun’s mom takes a billion pictures of them, going on and on about how cute they look together the entire time. Sehun and Jongin both blush profusely, but it’s nice, having the support of their families. (Then again, no one was really surprised when they came out as a couple, mutters of “About time” being exchanged under their breaths instead.)

This time, prom is held in the banquet hall of a nice hotel. This time, the punch is actually pretty good. And this time, when the slow songs start playing, Jongin holds a hand out to Sehun, the latter placing his own on top and letting the elder escort him to the dance floor.

Jongin places his hands on Sehun’s waist, and Sehun wraps his arms around Jongin’s neck. They sway to the music together, gazes locked, eyes filled with so much adoration for one another.

Sehun’s hair is back to black, but it’s still full, and wispy, soft to the touch. His eyelashes are long, creating shadows on the apples of his cheeks. His lips are a soft petal pink, pulled into a radiant smile. After all these years, Jongin still thinks he looks ethereal.

There’s a tap on his shoulder. Jongin turns to see Baekhyun and Chanyeol. “May I have this dance?” Baekhyun asks him, can see Chanyeol doing the same to Sehun from the corner of his eye. He laughs, and nods.

He dances with Baekhyun. It’s a bit difficult, considering their height differences, but they make it work.

Baekhyun grins, remarks, “You look happy.”

Jongin grins back, eyes shifting to look over at Sehun dancing with Chanyeol next to them. He looks back at Baekhyun, and says, “I am.”

-

At the conclusion of the prom, Jongin produces a keycard from his suit pocket. Sehun takes one look at it, and giggles. “You didn’t.”

Jongin shrugs. “I did.”

Sehun shakes his head fondly, but moves closer anyway, wrapping a hand around Jongin’s tie and tugging on it lightly to bring Jongin even closer, whispering against his lips, “Well, then. We can’t waste this opportunity, now. Can we?” There’s a flirtatiously tone in his voice, eyes dark, and it sets Jongin’s blood aflame.

“Definitely not.”

-

The silk sheets of the queen-sized bed are clinging to Sehun’s sweaty back, but he can’t bring himself to care, not when Jongin’s fingers are gently working him open. He lets out a whine, body arching up when Jongin’s finger brushes against his prostate.

Jongin freezes. “Did I hurt you?” He asks, nervous. They’ve never done anything like this before, and he’s not entirely sure what he’s doing, simply going by the limited knowledge he has from porn videos, and repeating things that Sehun says he likes.

“No,” Sehun breathes out, already sounding wrecked. “That was good. Do it again.”

So, Jongin does; presses against the bundle of nerves and adds fingers when Sehun tells him to. It’s not long before Sehun’s shaking, body flushed. He pushes Jongin back with a hand on his chest. “I’m ready.”

Jongin nods, gropes around the bed for the small bottle of lube he’d also snuck into his suit pocket. He slicks himself up, and leans over Sehun’s body, lining up. He give Sehun a kiss, pulls back just far enough to ask, “You’ll let me know if I hurt you, right?”

Sehun agrees. His heart is racing. This is really happening. They’re about to take the next step in their relationship, and it’s scary, nerve-wracking. But the excitement, the love and trust they have for one another outweighs everything else.

Jongin pushes in slowly, and Sehun tenses, fingers digging into Jongin’s arms.

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No,” Sehun shakes his head, voice high and thin. “Keep going.” He makes soft noises of slight discomfort, the stretch burning, until Jongin is all the way in, and then they just breathe against each other for a while, Jongin brushing away strands of hair from Sehun’s face.

“You okay?”

“Yeah,” Sehun mutters, raising his head to mold his lips against Jongin’s. They kiss for another few moments, and Jongin doesn’t even think to move until Sehun shifts underneath him, clenching around him as the discomfort begins to ebb away.

“ _Fuck_ , Sehun.” He groans, eyes going unfocused for a second. “Can I-”

Sehun hums, “Please. Make love to me, Jongin.”

The first few thrusts are small, minute rocking motions, like Jongin’s still afraid of accidentally hurting Sehun. Sehun tries to encourage him by running his fingers through Jongin’s sweaty locks, pressing soft kisses to his face.

Feeling more confident, Jongin pulls back until only the tip of his cock is inside, and snaps his hips, hitting Sehun’s prostate dead on, the younger moaning so loudly that it catches them both off guard. Jongin starts moving in earnest after that, wanting to pull more sinful noises from Sehun. They swear, try to breathe, and dig fingers into skin hard enough to leave marks.

Jongin has a lot to say, but he can’t make his voice work, not when the pleasure is this mind-numbing, so he mostly just groans into Sehun’s open mouth, his movements growing more erratic. Sehun clings to him tighter, face buried in his shoulder, spitting unintelligible strings of curses, toes curling.

And it’s _good_. Despite the fact that Sehun’s thighs cramp up halfway, or that Jongin’s rhythm is sometimes uneven, it’s _perfect_. Because this is bigger than anything either of them had ever done. Not a single other moment in their lives so far could stand up to it.

Jongin reaches down to wrap a hand around Sehun’s cock, and it only takes a few strokes and a few more thrusts to his prostate for Sehun to spill over his fist, mouth open in a silent cry.

The arm Jongin’s using to hold himself up begins to shake, hips stuttering at the tight hold Sehun has around his cock, and he whimpers. Sehun guides him down, lets Jongin bury his face against the side of his face. “Go ahead,” Sehun whispers when Jongin starts to fall apart. “You can finish inside.”

Jongin’s thrusts become sloppy, hips rolling mindlessly as he chases his end, finally finding his voice as he mutters “I love you,” against Sehun’s skin.

“And I love _you_.”

And then Jongin’s movements are faltering, body slumping forward as he releases into Sehun with a groan.

Sliding out of Sehun, Jongin slumps onto his side. “Was that okay?” He asks after he can breathe properly again. He peers at Sehun.

Sehun rolls towards him, and smiles. “Definitely more than okay. It was amazing.”

Jongin smiles back.

Here, lying in bed together, staring into one another’s eyes, they felt fearless, like nothing could touch them, like this moment would never end. Sehun scoots forward until his nose is touching Jongin’s, palm pressing against Jongin’s cheek. Jongin tries to say awake, but the exhaustion is beginning to settle in, so he grabs Sehun, pulls him even closer, his fingers tracing mindless patterns on the younger’s back until they both drift away.

-

It’s the last day of school. Tomorrow, they’ll be walking across the stage to receive their high school diplomas; the end of one chapter, and the beginning of another.

Sehun’s sitting on the bleachers at lunch, watching Baekhyun and Chanyeol kick around a soccer ball on the field below. Beside him, someone sits down. Turning his head, he sees Jongin. The elder passes him a sandwich he’d gotten from the cafeteria, and Sehun takes it with an appreciative smile.

“You want to join them?” Jongin asks, taking a bite of his own meal.

“Nah.” Sehun shakes his head, carefully removing the cling wrap from his sandwich. “I’m good.” They eat together, talking quietly about nothing, and everything.

Jongin gets up after they’re done to toss their trash, and Sehun leans his head back, closing his eyes to revel in the sun beams. It’s a bit warm, but there’s a cool breeze that makes it bearable. He hears Jongin retake his seat, and asks, “Do you believe in soulmates?” He doesn’t even have to look to know that Jongin is smiling, can hear it in his voice.

“Yeah. Do you?”

Sehun sighs softly, opens his eyes to see Jongin. He’s beaming, tan skin glowing in the sunlight, strands of brown locks dancing in the wind. He’s beautiful.

“I do.”

Jongin reaches down, intertwines their fingers. “Do you still think you’ve found one of your soulmates in me?”

Sehun lowers his gaze to their hands, squeezes Jongin’s gently. “Yeah,” He whispers, looks back up into Jongin’s eyes, and confesses, “The most important one.”

Jongin’s smile grows at that, so big, his eyes crinkle up into crescents, the tips of his ear turning a lovely shade of red. “Good. Because I feel the same about you.”

And maybe they’re too young to be saying such bold statements; too naive to comprehend the gravity of their words. But it’s okay. Because right now, those words made perfect sense.


End file.
